Density, Sidewaks, and the Perils of Both

The modern world in Asia is as dense with people as my mom’s former garden with weeds. The buildings are tall advertisements for Korean conglomerate companies, with their logos stamped on all corners reading Hyundai, Lotte, Samsung, and LG among others, begging the numerous consumers on the city streets to remember their favorite company. The cookie cutter skyscrapers house over 20 million people. About 60 years ago, the city I’m living in was mere rumble. How does a city rise from the ashes to become the world’s second largest city and the most “wired” city in the world? Industrialization has to be the only answer; Korea is China’s case study on growth and the consequences of such rapid growth.

Amongst the thick air, the fast culture, and a country fighting with problems of reunification and dependence to the United States lies a 22 year old who is mad. YES, I’m angry. The time is now, where I stand up and let my RAGE out. In the states, there is an epidemic called road rage. Everyone of course is familiar with this; a feeling washes over the driver like someone pointing out XYZ, warm blood travels throughout the body as mounting frustration follows closely behind. The driver is not in control during rush hour, and this leads to acts of fruitless hostility towards others on the crazy road of modernity. Slow drivers in fast lanes, fast drivers in slow lanes, and the normal drivers caught in the middle trying to navigate the chasm between the polar extremes.

I don’t have a vehicle in Korea, and I love it. Just as my pet peeves with traffic lights has been replaced by waiting for elevators, so too has road rage. In Korea, I have dubbed an epidemic, which I call “Sidewalk Rage” Seoul is a fast paced environment, much like every other big city in the world. Lost in all this hustle and bustle is me. I wake up at 2:00 in the afternoon every day, and I don’t go to sleep until like 4:00 at night, give or take two hours. College was not the real world, and this certainly is not either. I’m never in a hurry, and this is a direct conflict with the swift Koreans.

Here is a common example: Meg and I will be walking down the road and an on comer will be walking toward us heading the opposite way. The sidewalks are fairly large, and there is ample room for the misguided pedestrian to easily avoid us, yet to my continuing surprise they come at us like a heat seeking missile after an M-I-G. We are doing are part by picking a side and moving towards it by an easy three feet. Still here is a Korean heading over towards us! What are you doing, are you trying to send a message? I just don’t get it.

Then there are the slow walkers busy watching TV on their cell phones, texting their crushes, or innocently day dreaming about what food they want to eat with their kimchi tonight. I’m a slow walker sure, but these walkers are S-L-O-W walkers. Getting around the slow walkers can be tricky with all the fast walkers swirling around.

Slow walkers and fast walkers are difficult to manage, but it pales in comparison to the traffic. Yes, there is traffic on the sidewalks of Seoul. Parking lots must be hard to come by, so if a driver needs to get to the bank, then that driver will just park on the sidewalk near the bank. It’s maddening. These drivers will cut you off on the SIDEWALK! My friend Doug was almost hit a couple of weeks ago. And the damn mopeds!!! Oh, man the mopeds piss me off! They are ziggin and a zagging through the people like professional slalom skiers. These moped drivers are usually delivery men of pizzas and other foods. They drive on the roads, and if a red light comes up they just hoop on the sidewalk like it’s I-435. I’m not normally a violent man, but I want to drop an elbow on these drivers on a consistent basis. I had a dream where I was the frog in “Frogger.” Instead of a street, I was trying to get from point A to point B on the sidewalk. You already know my obstacles, and I couldn't even get past level 1. So in this age of speed, remember to SLOW DOWN, besides you’ll live longer.